For many people, spiritual awakening isn’t a single moment of enlightenment — it’s a gradual unraveling of old beliefs, emotional barriers, and identity patterns. In this deeply personal conversation, Berto Cartagena shares how his experiences with ayahuasca reshaped his understanding of faith, purpose, and the meaning of transformation. Rather than presenting spirituality as a fixed doctrine, his story reveals a journey filled with questioning, surrender, and rediscovery.
Searching for Meaning Beyond Self-Improvement
Before encountering ayahuasca, Berto describes himself as spiritually curious but still searching for something deeper. He explored self-help philosophies and motivational teachings that promised empowerment and success. While these ideas initially felt inspiring, he eventually noticed that external motivation alone wasn’t changing his inner world.
A recurring theme in his early life was a hidden belief that he wasn’t good enough — a quiet voice that shaped how he approached relationships, ambition, and identity. Despite pursuing big goals and outward success, he felt disconnected from a deeper sense of purpose.
Ayahuasca entered his life not as an escape, but as an invitation to look inward. What he discovered wasn’t simply mystical insight — it was an emotional confrontation with himself.
The Ceremony as a Mirror
During his ceremonies, Berto describes receiving what felt like intuitive “downloads” — moments of clarity that didn’t arrive as spoken words but as deep inner knowing. Rather than chasing visions, he found himself confronting emotional patterns he had ignored for years.
One of the most powerful realizations was that he had been operating from a guarded heart. The medicine revealed how ambition and drive had sometimes replaced vulnerability and love. Memories of family members surfaced, bringing waves of emotion and connection that felt overwhelming but healing at the same time.
These experiences weren’t easy. Many of his ceremonies were intense and challenging, pushing him to surrender control rather than analyze every moment. Through this process, he began to understand that spiritual awakening often involves discomfort — letting go of familiar narratives and allowing deeper truths to emerge.
Faith, Symbolism, and Personal Interpretation
A significant part of Berto’s journey involved reconciling spirituality with his Christian upbringing. During one ceremony, he experienced imagery that felt deeply connected to religious symbolism, leading him to explore faith from a new perspective. Instead of seeing spirituality and religion as separate, he began to notice parallels between different traditions.
He reflects on how teachings across Christianity, Buddhism, and other spiritual paths often point toward similar values — love, surrender, compassion, and growth. The language may differ, but the underlying message feels consistent: transformation begins with humility and openness.
Rather than interpreting these experiences as literal instructions, he came to view them as invitations to examine his own beliefs. Spiritual awakening, in his view, isn’t about blindly following messages but about developing discernment and personal responsibility.
The Lessons of Surrender
One of the strongest themes in his story is the practice of surrender. Berto realized that much of his suffering came from trying to control outcomes — relationships, career goals, financial success. The medicine showed him how attachment to expectations could create internal conflict.
He shares moments where life events mirrored this lesson, such as losing financial gains after becoming overly focused on money and status. These experiences forced him to confront what truly mattered and question whether external success aligned with his deeper values.
Through these challenges, he began to shift his focus from achievement toward service — seeing himself less as someone chasing influence and more as someone called to help others grow.
Awakening Isn’t Always Comfortable
Berto is honest about the struggles that followed his spiritual experiences. Awakening didn’t instantly solve his problems or bring constant clarity. Instead, it introduced new questions about purpose, faith, and identity.
He describes periods of confusion, doubt, and adjustment — moments where integrating spiritual insight into daily life felt more difficult than the ceremonies themselves. This phase of integration required patience, humility, and a willingness to revisit old habits.
His story highlights an important reality: spiritual awakening is not a permanent state of bliss. It’s an ongoing process of learning, refining, and adapting.
Finding Purpose Through Service
As his journey unfolded, Berto began to feel drawn toward sharing his experiences with others. Initially, he believed this meant building a large online presence or becoming an influencer. Over time, however, his understanding of being a “messenger” shifted.
Instead of focusing on visibility or status, he now sees purpose as helping people become unstuck — offering guidance rooted in his own struggles and transformation. This shift reflects a broader lesson from his ceremonies: purpose isn’t always about grand achievements; sometimes it’s about small acts of compassion and connection.
A Message About Love and Balance
Throughout the conversation, Berto returns to a simple yet profound insight — that love is at the center of spiritual awakening. Ayahuasca didn’t replace his faith or identity; it helped him rediscover the importance of relationships, family, and emotional honesty.
He emphasizes that the medicine itself isn’t the source of transformation. Instead, it acts as a tool that can bring individuals closer to their own truth, encouraging reflection and growth. The real work happens afterward, in daily choices and personal responsibility.
Spiritual Awakening as a Lifelong Journey
Berto’s story challenges the idea that awakening is a single breakthrough moment. Instead, it appears as a continuous unfolding — a process of questioning, integrating, and evolving. The lessons he shares point toward balance: honoring ambition while staying grounded in compassion, exploring spirituality without losing discernment, and embracing vulnerability as a form of strength.
Ultimately, his journey suggests that spiritual awakening isn’t about escaping life’s challenges. It’s about learning to meet them with openness, faith, and a willingness to grow. Ayahuasca, for him, became a catalyst — not an endpoint — guiding him toward a deeper relationship with himself and the world around him.
Based on the Ayahuasca Podcast episode “Spiritual awakening through Ayahuasca” with Sam Believ and Berto Cartagena.
